Okay I am writing a book I need feed back ( I am aware the grammar is bad )?

the man character is a man named bruce who is all in all unimpressive he obsesses and fantasizes about this woman he hired named Lily. He got a job at his fathers publishing company after he had no where else to go. There was a time where he had promise and self worth but not anymore. he likes Lily because she is sweet to him. However he is aware this is only because she knows no better. If she knew how weak he really was she'd disrespect him like everyone else. at this point in the story he hears lily saying that he was cute( and he is I described him as marlone brando) and probably had many girlfriends. his father is deeming his mother is overbearing and he is miserable. any suggestion where I should go how to make him more Masculine . Eventually in the story he is going to become some one you stop routing for because he will take advantage of Lily the only person more fragile them. Jill is going to become the protagonist.